I want to caveat this
blog by saying this – I am not a writer and I never thought a blog would be something
I would even consider doing. I am a self-proclaimed math nerd and I love my job
as a tax accountant at a Big 4 firm. I am much more creative with a canvas and
a paintbrush than with words and a pencil. But this blog is not about my job,
my hobbies, or the things that I like to think I am good at. This blog is about
something much more important – my relationship with Jesus Christ. In recent
weeks and months, I have felt a stronger desire than ever to share this
relationship with those around me.
I decided to start a blog
shortly after deciding to take a break from social media. When our enemy wants
to get a hold of my heart, sometimes all he has to do is point my eyes in the
direction of someone else’s life. I've been bitter, anxious, and upset with God
over my circumstances; all the while failing to appreciate the tremendous
blessings that He was so faithful to provide. Comparison doesn't have to have a
catalyst, but I had noticed in the past year that there was a direct
correlation to the time I spent on social media and the level of contentment I
had with life. The grass always seemed greener on someone else’s news-feed, if
you know what I mean. I had toyed around with the idea of getting off social
media, but just like anything else I had plenty of excuses not to. I prayed and
prayed for God to “give me contentment,” but I wanted it on my own terms and on
my timing.
An opportunity and a
challenge to give up social media came when I joined a Sunday school class at
my new church in Houston. My class was going to go through the book, “A Call to
Die” by David Nasser. This book is a 40 day prayer and devotional journey to
grow closer to God while putting to death the selfish desires that we so often let
consume our lives. Part of the study
including fasting from something that you felt was keeping you from making the
most out of your relationship with God. Some of my friends gave up sweets or
watching TV shows, but after some time spent in prayer, I felt convicted that I
needed to spend time with God instead of my 800 Facebook friends. On about day
5 of the book, I had the following thought –
“Why do I spend so much time sharing the most insignificant details of
my life on social media, but I hardly spend any time at all sharing the most
important aspect of my life – my relationship with God?”
God provided me with a
lot of opportunities to understand the answer to this question. Whether I was
at church, at Passion, in Bible study, or doing my own quiet time, there was a
common thread in what I was learning. Humans like to be selfish. I like to be
selfish. I was using social media to
build up my own little kingdom, and then getting upset when it didn't look as
pretty as someone else’s. I was seeking to glorify MYSELF. The problem with
that is this – God created each of us with a very clear purpose – to glorify
HIM.
Psalms 145:18 says this, “The
Lord is near to all who call upon Him, to all who will call upon Him in truth.”
As I have purposely sought out God, I have seen this verse come to life more
than I ever had before. The Lord has been so faithful to answer the smallest
prayers, building my trust in Him and demonstrating His love for me. I have been able to look back on
circumstances that were painful and hard, and appreciate that God has brought
me through them. That contentment I mentioned earlier? God taught me that it
was never a matter of Him giving it to me, but instead a matter of me choosing
to accept that He is my contentment in every situation. Matt Chandler once said
that “when you realize life isn't about you, you feel a lot more free.” I
couldn't agree more.
It is my prayer that
through this blog, other people are exposed to the love that Jesus Christ has
for all of us through the different things He is teaching me. The same God that
loved us enough to send His only son to die on the cross for our sins loves us
enough to let our lives play a part in His greater story.
To me- that is love
worth sharing.
