Choice.

It is safe to say that we have been bombarded for months with the importance of the “choice” Americans are making today, November 8, 2016. The weight of this choice has caused the most division and anxiety that I’ve ever seen in our country in my mere 24 years of life. In the spirit of transparency, I will be the first to admit that I’ve struggled with this election. I’ve avoided the news and social media because I have wanted to avoid the chaos and hatred. I’ve worried about the future of our country and the uncertainty of the days to come. I’ve prayed for the hearts of Americans to change and be drawn towards God. This election has been a true test of faith for me, and I know I am not alone in that trial. Today I’ve realized that in the big picture of life, my choice for president of the United States is really pretty small. I feel in my heart that I need to share my thoughts on a few other important choices that we all have to make in the days to come.

You have made your choice and cast your vote for president of the United States, but we have another choice to make tomorrow. As followers of Christ, we have to make the choice on a day by day, moment by moment basis to put our complete faith and complete trust in God and His sovereignty. After the ballots are in and the results are announced, we have a choice in how we react. What would it look like if we decided to live out our faith, pray for our elected leaders, and love those around us? 1 Timothy 2:1-4 gives us the following command, “I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people— ² for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. ³ This is good, and pleases God our Savior, ⁴ who wants all people to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.” God knew a long time ago who was going to win the 2016 election. Our purpose in life is not to place our security in a political leader. Our purpose in life is to know God, trust God, glorify God in our words and deeds, and to share the good news of the gospel with everyone on this planet.

Regardless of the outcome, we have the choice to pray for the leaders of our country. Even if you do not agree with who is elected, I urge each of you to be persistent in prayer for our country and our leaders. The Bible has numerous stories of how God has touched the hearts of kings and leaders throughout history. In the book of Ezra, the Lord “stirred up the spirit” of Cyrus the king of Persia and allowed for the reconstruction of the temple in Jerusalem, fulfilling the promise He made to his people. Proverbs 21:1 states, “The king’s heart is in the hand of the Lord, like the rivers of water, He turns it wherever He wishes.” God CAN intercede in the hearts of our leaders. He can give them wisdom and discernment. Pray without ceasing, friends.

Here’s the thing. The president of the United States can’t offer us the security and hope that we have in Jesus Christ. The absolute most important choice that any of us will ever make is the choice to accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. Our creator and our father in Heaven loves us more than we can comprehend. He loves with the kind of love that says, “I will die for you so that I can spend forever in eternity with you.” When we accept Jesus Christ as our savior, we trade our temporary home on this Earth for an eternal citizenship in Heaven. I pray that if anyone reading this has not accepted Christ as their savior that God stirs their heart towards Him.

In the uncertainty of this election season I pray that people see that security, hope, and love cannot be found outside of a relationship with God. I pray that those of us who follow Christ can lead others to Christ by our unwavering faith. I pray that each of us makes the daily choice to trust God in ALL circumstances and love others the way that he does. I pray for God glorifying change in our country. Above all, I pray that each day, I choose Him. 

¹² Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord,
    the people he chose for his inheritance.
¹³ From heaven the Lord looks down
    and sees all mankind;
¹⁴ from his dwelling place he watches
    all who live on earth—
¹⁵ he who forms the hearts of all,
    who considers everything they do.

¹⁶ No king is saved by the size of his army;
    no warrior escapes by his great strength.
¹⁷ A horse is a vain hope for deliverance;
    despite all its great strength it cannot save.
¹⁸ But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him,
    on those whose hope is in his unfailing love,
¹⁹ to deliver them from death
    and keep them alive in famine.

²⁰ We wait in hope for the Lord;
    he is our help and our shield.
²¹ In him our hearts rejoice,
    for we trust in his holy name.
²² May your unfailing love be with us, Lord,
    even as we put our hope in you. 

-Psalm 33:12-22

Saying Yes to God's Best

Yesterday a friend asked me how I knew Taylor was “the one.” It was a harder question than I thought it would be to answer, because it is hard to put into words the peace that God gave me during that time of our lives. As today marks 1 year from the day that Taylor asked me to spend forever with him, I thought there was no better time to share this part of our story.

Taylor & I had a whirlwind dating experience. We went on our first date April 18, 2015. We said, “I love you”, 3 weeks later. 6 weeks into dating, Taylor had talked to my parents and was hiding an engagement ring in his sock drawer. 3 and a half months of dating later, Taylor asked me to be his wife on August 15^th, 2015. I look back all the time and remember the day I told my mom that I didn’t trust myself to know if someone was the one. I had a clouded mindset on love due to failed relationships and painful lessons. I told her that God was just going to have to know for me, because there was no way that I would ever know on my own. And let me tell you, God knew. God knew a long time ago. God knew every lesson I had to learn, mistake I had to make, every prayer that had to be prayed for me to have an open heart to see the man that He had picked out for me in eternity to spend my life with.

Before dating Taylor, relationships made me a big ball of anxiety and insecurity. I never felt like I could be 100% myself because just maybe that other person wouldn’t accept me for who I was, or I would be too much for them to handle. I was constantly comparing myself to ex-girlfriends of the past and I would spend all of my time trying to be the perfect girlfriend, which quite frankly is exhausting and overwhelming. I found myself praying to God justifying the wrong relationships, as if God would bend His will to mine because of my perceived “good reasons.” I never knew of this mythical peace you were supposed to have in the right relationship and started to doubt that it really existed.

So back to my friend’s question…knowing Taylor was the one. I could list all of the qualities of my husband that I am attracted to, that made me fall in love with him. Taylor is an incredible man. He has a wonderful family, he is an extremely hard worker, he loves the Lord, he is strong in his faith in areas that I am weak, he never fails to make me laugh, and he is extremely compassionate. When I started to think about how I was going to answer my friend’s question, the qualities that describe Taylor aren’t what jumped into my mind as the reason he was “the one”. I knew Taylor was the one because of the peace I felt about him and about our relationship.

Taylor & I started our relationship with a lot of talking, and a lot of praying. Of course there was instant attraction and chemistry, but we both were at a point in our lives where we wanted to make sure that dating was what God wanted, not just what we wanted. We both continually prayed, “God, if this is your will – make it obvious!” I remember having conversations with Taylor before we “officially” started dating about how things were going so well, and it would be really hard if God told us no. We kept putting our relationship in God’s hands, and asking Him to lead us towards the next steps. When Taylor asked me to be his girlfriend, we both knew that we were going to get married. Finally, I understood that peace and that “when you know, you know” feeling. Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Be anxious about nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, shall guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” With Taylor, I wasn’t praying anxious prayers anticipating and trying to prevent the worst. We were both thanking God for the relationship He had blessed us with and asking for His wisdom on the next steps for us. I never felt anything but peace with Taylor. I never doubted him. Saying yes to forever with Taylor was the easiest decision I ever made.

I don’t want to discount the importance of dating with discernment. Date someone that loves the Lord. Date someone who shares your vision for the future. Date someone that is your best friend. But, trust God to lead you to this person. Even when it is hard – keep the faith that God’s plan is so, so good. Pray for God’s will in your relationship. Trust His timing, and experience the peace that only He can bring.

God picked Taylor to be “the one” for me a long time ago, and everything about our relationship is part of His story. We are just blessed to share the same chapter.

What Walking Around Target Taught me About Love

Tonight I walked through Target hand in hand with my fiancé Taylor, tissue paper for my bridal party gifts, and a Starbucks caramel Frappuccino. This probably sounds like a typical Tuesday errand night to a lot of people, but as Taylor & I walked aimlessly through the aisles laughing at things for sale and talking about our dreams of our future home together, my thoughts kept circling back to a very similar night about a year ago. That is when the realization hit me.  God taught me about love through a walk around Target and a Starbucks cup.

Since I realize this connection doesn’t make much sense, let me back track a little bit and tell you about Taylor. Taylor is the most wonderful human being I have ever met. After years of telling my family and friends that the right guy would have to “step it up” and “pursue me” because I wasn’t about to change who I was and become some flirty, bold girl that I’m not – Taylor was that guy. He asked me to go on a date. Not to hang out at a bar. Not to chill and watch a movie. But take me on a real date, where we were able to talk to each other and get to know each other’s personalities, goals, careers, families and values. Did I also mention he drove 45 minutes to my parents’ house to pick me up?

One of our early dates consisted of going to Target, getting Starbucks, and walking around. This was about a week after our first date. That week in between was full of late night phone calls and being thankful for coffee at work, since we spent more time on the phone than sleeping. After all that time spent talking, during our three hour walk around Target Taylor didn’t hold my hand. He didn’t kiss me when he said goodbye. And this is when I realized that God was teaching me about love the way He intended for it to be, before our “Swipe Right” world perverted one of God’s most beautiful gifts to us on this Earth. Taylor purposefully chose to treat me like this. Not because he didn’t like me, but because he respected me. Because he saw me as a daughter of God before he saw me as an object of his affection. Because he valued a relationship with my soul more than he valued knowing my body.

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude, it does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong doing, bur rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.” 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

When I look at the most well-known verse on love in the Bible, I see it so beautifully illustrated in the early days of Taylor & I’s dating relationship. Taylor & I were patient and took time to get to know each other’s souls, not each other’s bodies. He never had an attitude of arrogance or expectation, but an attitude of respect, chivalry, and servitude. We took the time to talk about what we felt like God’s way of dating was, not our own ways as humans.

I knew that I was in love with Taylor before he ever kissed me. 4 months later he got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife. The foundation we established early on is the love we learned from God that bears the trials we face in life, believes in the perfect plans the Lord has for us, remains hopeful in this crazy world, and endures throughout our entire lives.

As Taylor & I finished up our trip tonight, God just really put it on my heart to share this little story. My prayer is that maybe someone reads it and it speaks to them personally. That the girl wondering if and when God is ever going to write their love story is encouraged that waiting for a man who is going to love them the way God intends is so incredibly worth it. That the guy wondering how to even go about pursuing a girl in our society is reminded that doing it right is meaningful and glorifies the Lord. And that just maybe, someone who doesn’t know Jesus as their Savior realizes that the greatest love story was already written many, many years ago on a Cross. We love only because of the tremendous love He has for us. 

Set Apart to Stand Out

A few weekends ago, I had the opportunity to attend the Passion Conference at the Toyota Center in Houston. I had heard of Passion in college but wasn’t ever sure if I would be comfortable with it or even get anything out of it. For some reason though, this year I felt like God was making it clear that He wanted me to be there. So, on a whim, I signed up and dove head first into a weekend of worship, Bible study, and exhaustion. It also might have seemed like a good way to meet people in the Sunday School class I had been going to for a few weeks and stop feeling like the new kid every Sunday….

God, being the loving and all-knowing God that He is, answered prayers that weekend that I hadn’t even had the courage to pray. But considering who He is, is that really so hard to believe? That God, who loves me enough to desire to have a relationship with me - was able to strengthen my faith in Him by answering unspoken prayers about finding community in Houston - as I went out of my comfort zone to learn more about Him? On a small level, that is where the thoughts I want to share begin. Amazing teachers of the Word revitalized my desire to pursue our Lord, equipped me with a personalized battle strategy against the enemy, and reminded me of the importance of never taking the cross for granted that weekend. But a concept that has been on my mind since Passion didn’t come from a pastor – instead from a new friend.

One night when walking to our next Bible study, we got on the subject of dealing with past hurts and heartaches and how quite frankly, living the Christian life can be really hard. It can seem like standing out as a Christian keeps us from the things that we think we really want. It is hard to see people who choose not to actively walk with God getting the deepest desires of our hearts. During this discussion, my  friend said something to the extent of this.

“When we are set apart, we are easily found”

A simple, yet profound and all together confusing statement. It got me thinking – What does it mean to be set apart as a Christian? How do we really stand out to others through our faith in Jesus Christ ?

               

I believe that the Bible tells us that we have to know that we were set apart in order to stand out. The writer of Hebrews says, “We have been set apart as holy because Jesus Christ did what God wanted Him to do by sacrificing His body once and for all” (Hebrews 10:10) What does this mean?

1. We are set apart through the love of God

2. That love came with a very real price – Jesus’ life

3. We stand out when God’s love is in our hearts and overflows into our lives

We don’t get to choose our life circumstances. Jesus, however, chose to endure the ultimate suffering on the cross for our sins. When we think about the struggles that we are going through, it is so humbling to think about the suffering Jesus went through willingly because of His love for us. When we are placed in a hard situation, we do get to choose how we are going to react and who we are going to turn to. Every joy and every trial gives us the opportunity to stand out.

James 1:2-4 is one of my favorite passages of scripture, reminding me that tests from God and temptations from the enemy are opportunities to grow in faith and gain wisdom. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” Notice how the verse says WHEN you face trials. It doesn’t say if. When we choose to stand out by living for Christ, we are guaranteed to deal with some pain.  In Ben Stuart’s book “This Changes Everything,” he says that we can rejoice in trials NOT because we know the reason behind them – but because we know Jesus. We know the end of the story, and we know that it is good. We are on the winning team!

               

You might be thinking at this point that standing out sounds like a lot of pressure. I know this thought has crossed my mind a few hundred times. What happens when I stumble? When I break under the weight of a situation and Satan lures me into thinking I’m not good enough to stand out for Christ? That is exactly what he wants. The enemy wants us to be so weighed down in our failures that we think there is no way we can be a light in this world, so there is no point in even trying. Romans 3:23 says this, “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” God knows we are going to mess up. This isn’t news to Him. If we were perfect, there wouldn’t be a need for Jesus to begin with! You are going to stumble. I do probably more on a daily basis than I would like to even try to quantify.

So back to my friend and I’s conversation – yeah, life is hard. The Christian life is promised to be full of trials.  But no matter what circumstances come our way, when we know we have been set apart through Christ’s love, we know that His love is going to carry us through. When His love is evident in our lives to others, we might just encourage them to join in on the adventure. So when you fall down, turn to Jesus. Stand back up. And keep standing out.

Love Worth Sharing

I want to caveat this blog by saying this – I am not a writer and I never thought a blog would be something I would even consider doing. I am a self-proclaimed math nerd and I love my job as a tax accountant at a Big 4 firm. I am much more creative with a canvas and a paintbrush than with words and a pencil. But this blog is not about my job, my hobbies, or the things that I like to think I am good at. This blog is about something much more important – my relationship with Jesus Christ. In recent weeks and months, I have felt a stronger desire than ever to share this relationship with those around me.

I decided to start a blog shortly after deciding to take a break from social media. When our enemy wants to get a hold of my heart, sometimes all he has to do is point my eyes in the direction of someone else’s life. I've been bitter, anxious, and upset with God over my circumstances; all the while failing to appreciate the tremendous blessings that He was so faithful to provide. Comparison doesn't have to have a catalyst, but I had noticed in the past year that there was a direct correlation to the time I spent on social media and the level of contentment I had with life. The grass always seemed greener on someone else’s news-feed, if you know what I mean. I had toyed around with the idea of getting off social media, but just like anything else I had plenty of excuses not to. I prayed and prayed for God to “give me contentment,” but I wanted it on my own terms and on my timing.

An opportunity and a challenge to give up social media came when I joined a Sunday school class at my new church in Houston. My class was going to go through the book, “A Call to Die” by David Nasser. This book is a 40 day prayer and devotional journey to grow closer to God while putting to death the selfish desires that we so often let consume our lives.  Part of the study including fasting from something that you felt was keeping you from making the most out of your relationship with God. Some of my friends gave up sweets or watching TV shows, but after some time spent in prayer, I felt convicted that I needed to spend time with God instead of my 800 Facebook friends. On about day 5 of the book, I had the following thought –

“Why do I spend so much time sharing the most insignificant details of my life on social media, but I hardly spend any time at all sharing the most important aspect of my life – my relationship with God?”

God provided me with a lot of opportunities to understand the answer to this question. Whether I was at church, at Passion, in Bible study, or doing my own quiet time, there was a common thread in what I was learning. Humans like to be selfish. I like to be selfish.  I was using social media to build up my own little kingdom, and then getting upset when it didn't look as pretty as someone else’s. I was seeking to glorify MYSELF. The problem with that is this – God created each of us with a very clear purpose – to glorify HIM.

Psalms 145:18 says this, “The Lord is near to all who call upon Him, to all who will call upon Him in truth.” As I have purposely sought out God, I have seen this verse come to life more than I ever had before. The Lord has been so faithful to answer the smallest prayers, building my trust in Him and demonstrating His love for me.  I have been able to look back on circumstances that were painful and hard, and appreciate that God has brought me through them. That contentment I mentioned earlier? God taught me that it was never a matter of Him giving it to me, but instead a matter of me choosing to accept that He is my contentment in every situation. Matt Chandler once said that “when you realize life isn't about you, you feel a lot more free.” I couldn't agree more.

It is my prayer that through this blog, other people are exposed to the love that Jesus Christ has for all of us through the different things He is teaching me. The same God that loved us enough to send His only son to die on the cross for our sins loves us enough to let our lives play a part in His greater story.

To me- that is love worth sharing.